I have scars… some come from my wild childhood, mostly on my knees (what a surprise !) or on my head (and my face…. wild I said!). Some are testimonies of my country’s policy on vaccination, and therefore can link me to my birthplace. Some are milestones of my medical history. I had an appendicectomy at age 11 which left a scar on my right side.
And I have a scar that is really important to me… It’s on my left collarbone. I got it when a surgeon proceeded a biopsy… it’s the only memory Hodgkin’s disease left me. 15 years ago, I had to fight a lymphoma. And I won. I won more than a battle against a disease. It was more than a disease. When the diagnosis was put, I was a dynamic woman, about to settle in the other side of the world, getting married a few months later, full of projects and willing to make her life the best possible… When I think about it, Hodgkin’s is the best thing that could happen to me. And when I look or touch my scar, this is what I feel: it took me to a path I couldn’t even have imagined. It gave me the strength to fight death, face to face. It gave me the strength to fight the disease while helping my familly to cope with it. It made me stronger than ever, even if my full body had to go through the worst time. At the end of my treatment, I gained a lot of weight (thank you cortison!), lost each and every hair of my body (and before that, my hair was really really long, so long I could almost sit on it….), it was really hard for me to go from a place to another one without having to make breaks (remember, I was supposed to make a life on the other side of Earth before that!).
Anyway, Hodgkin’s disease also gave me the strength to fight anything, to face anything, and to trust my gut feelings more than ever. It also taught me I was stronger than I thought, and even maybe stronger than those around me… it made me a strong mature woman. It made me the one I am I guess. And it gave me the strength to face what I had to face these last years. It help my daughter to face her own fight too, especially at the beginning, as we could talk about it without taboo. We talked about my own experience knowing that if my cancer was curable, hers wasn’t. But treatments and side effects were similar, and I could really hear and understand what she felt.
I NEVER saw my daughter as a victim of cancer. I saw her as my daughter. And I think that it made the difference for her. When we were given bad news, we allowed ourselves to cry for one hour… then we set our minds on the fighting mode…
Anyway, I have scars on my body… But the most important one can not be seen. It lays on my heart… It’s there, I can feel it each and every day. But like my other scars, the one people can see, I am proud of it. Because it means I survived. My scars tell my story. And to me, they are really important testimonies, even if the most meaningfull is left unseen. It’s mine, and it’s the one that makes me going on each and everyday for a little more than a year.
This week, we will be proud of our scars!
Quote: « Never be ashamed of a scar. It simply means you were stronger than whatever tried to hurt you.”
Here are the rules of the challenge:
- Each thursday, I’ll give you a quote and a pattern to play with. You can use both, you can use only one of them, it’s up to you.
- You have till the next wednesday to make your card and share it with us in the facebook group (just ask to be added, and I will open the doors wide open to you )
- The goal of this challenge it just to offer yourself a time to have fun with pens and cards, to ponder on words, to enjoy a ME time. We tend to forget about ourselves so easily! And sharing is such a beautiful thing to experiment in our life!
Here is my card :
While drawing it, with my usual black pen, I really felt something was missing… And then I remembered what I did with the flower heart of my last challenge… so I took my color pencils and played a bit with them… it changed everything!!
Can you see the difference? So fro now on, I guess I will play with them a lot more!